Thursday, 28 February 2013

Two Avengers nightmare scuffle

This is a true story....

  Keith Woodcock

Keith's version:
On Saturday 23rd February, after returning to the Daventry Court Hotel from a superb curry and a few glasses of wine at the Asia restaurant in Daventry where all three Anglian Avengers teams met up for a catch up between rounds, Martin Fogg and I had a drink at the hotel bar then retired into the labyrinth of corridors and rooms to find our twin room 246.   Once the curtains are closed in these rooms they are particularly dark which is great for a good night’s sleep.   On the very comfortable bed I soon fell asleep.

It was around 4 a.m. when I suddenly awoke to the sound of someone moving around to the left hand side of me. In my room it was so dark I could barely make out a distant shadow (I believed at this point I was in my own bed at home where I live alone; this of course was incorrect!).   After briefly analysing the situation and reluctant to move so as not to alert an intruder that I was awake, I decided that someone had definitely broken into my home, got in my bedroom and was emptying the wardrobe of all its totally useless contents, which in fact should have been done years ago!   So I jumped up onto Martin’s bed and started punching and scratching and shouting at him “get out of my flat”!   Poor ole Martin, who didn’t deserve this in any way, startled and confused, very quickly punched me and shouted “JUST STOP”!   Immediately i recognised Martin’s voice and stopped, then went into an uncontrollable shake and a feeling of unjust remorse for my confused outburst.   Martin is a great guy with the patience of a saint!   He then sat up in bed and effectively counselled me for half an hour while I calmed down.

Marty I hope you’re not too bruised.   I do have a bit of a ‘shiner’ round me eye but I’m sure it’ll clear up in a day or so.   Ooo and if you want to press charges I’ll plead guilty as long as they’ll allow a couple of chess books and Fritz in the asylum!   lol

  Martin Fogg

Martin's version:
Me and Keith both stayed at the hotel bar for a couple of drinks after our indian meal that night.  We spectated some blitz and then left for our room around midnight in high spirits because both of us had crushed our opponents in round 5 of the 4NCL.

I slept soundly for 4 hours until Keith decided that clearly wasn't acceptable behaviour!  Still gripped in the hold of a nightmare that his home had been burgled, Keith was convinced that I had sneaked inside his apartment.

My comatose state of mind and inert body must have posed a considerable threat to him once he came to this realisation, because he then proceeded to scratch, punch and slap every piece of me that he could reach in an attempt to evict me from our hotel room.  I hollered and yelled at him to come to his senses (whilst somehow trying to defend myself only seconds after being awoken by the most extreme alarm clock I will probably ever encounter) for what seemed like an eternity before it was all over.

To say that I was paranoid for the next few hours until breakfast was rather an understatement...   Lol


4 comments:

  1. No wonder Martin lost and Keith didn't play that morning!
    It can't get funnier than this. It just can't. Mind you, it was just the day before when I had to get repaired because I was paired against a blind player (what are the chances). I guess chess isn't a universal language after all!

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  2. Yer, how bizzare Silas, I mean there must have been three to four hundred boards in the playing hall on Saturday and you not able to speak being paired against a blind player! I wonder if there's a chess playing mathmatician out there who could give us the odds on that happening?

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  3. So that's why Martin put in his first appearance for breakfast since time immemorial!

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  4. Next time Keith, pick on someone your own size...

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